The Ratio is Off

"Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection" (itsalwayssteve) 10/08/2015 at 14:34 • Filed to: evoque

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Work is slow so I’m doing a bit more dicking around than work today. We got an Evoque in the shop for seat heaters. I asked my wife,

“Why does this green look so much better on this than a Kia Soul?”

She replied,

“It’s because it’s a higher $$$$$$$$$$$ car, and a way cool one at that. Keep Dreaming, babe!”

Wait until she sees the inside:

I like it. A lot, actually, but these are WAY out of our budget. And too small.

djmt1 > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:37

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I forgot you could get the Evoque as a 3 door. It looks good.

Tohru > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:42

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A baby poo green stripe is not something I want to see on the seat of a car that costs twice as much as my house.

duurtlang > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:42

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When seeing an Evoque on a picture I don’t dislike it. In real life though, when parked or driving near other cars, the odd proportions become hideous imho. The first time I saw an Evoque from behind as it passed me on the highway I actually started to laugh.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > Tohru 10/08/2015 at 14:43

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This was the $50k Range Rover. Not the $120k Range Rover.

Van Man, rocks the Man Van > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:44

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I honestly don’t really like the green outside. However, my neighbors just bought one in bronze with 20” wheels, panoramic sunroof, and a white roof. Looks fantastic.

M54B30 > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:48

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Can we just pause for a moment and realize that on a $50,000 range rover, a premium brand, heated seats are not standard equipment.

Yikes.

CalzoneGolem > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:49

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They are quite similarly shaped to the Soul. My wife hates the way her Soul looks but wants an Evoque. When I informed her that we’d be paying around 3x per month for it her Soul started looking a little bit better.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > duurtlang 10/08/2015 at 14:53

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IT seems that there are heaters and coolers in the cupholders.

That’s insane - especially since we’re putting seat heaters in it. Also the sunroof that takes up the whole roof is pretty cool.

Tohru > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:53

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My house was $35k.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > Tohru 10/08/2015 at 14:54

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So really it’s 140% of your house.

Tohru > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 14:57

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When I made my comment I didn’t know what the MSRP on an Evoque is. Now the joke is dead. You’ve killed it. You monster. You don’t even care, do you.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > CalzoneGolem 10/08/2015 at 15:06

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Sized and shaped similar, yeah. That’s my Soul next to it. I could do with the wide 20” wheels and extra power...

Sam > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 15:11

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I like them. They like a lifted car, which is great. It carries it’s weight well. Plus, the engine will be reliable, since it’s a 2.0L EcoBoost.

CalzoneGolem > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 15:13

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Couldn’t we all brother. Couldn’t we all.

ColoradoTaco > Tohru 10/08/2015 at 15:14

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Where the hell you live? My house is only 940sq/ft and is valued at about $230k right now

FazeRacer > ColoradoTaco 10/08/2015 at 15:23

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My house is less than twice the size of your and 3x the cost. Yay?

Tohru > ColoradoTaco 10/08/2015 at 15:26

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My house is ~900sq. ft., in a rural Wisconsin town of ~600 people.

It’s actually went down in value since I bought it. My tireless neglect of the lawn and property pays off with lower property taxes!

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 15:52

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I’ve driven one of these for a few hundred miles. I love it. The visibility can stand to be better but I loved near everything else about driving the car.

The only thing that really didn’t like is how quick the steering is, relative to how much slower the yaw rate is. It’s annoying a little, but not a deal breaker

BoxerFanatic, troublesome iconoclast. > Tohru 10/08/2015 at 16:54

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Are you living in a late model used van, down by the river?

House != $35K.

BoxerFanatic, troublesome iconoclast. > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 16:57

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Now if it came in metallic dark green with bronze wheels and saddle leather, that would be cool.

I like the 3-door bit. I REALLY like it.

It wouldn’t bother me if the roof were more horizontal, no higher at the front, not as low at the back, and the rear windows were wider than gun ports on a pill-box bunker.

Tohru > BoxerFanatic, troublesome iconoclast. 10/08/2015 at 17:27

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I assure you it is a house, with a lawn and a 1 car garage and a $300/mo mortgage and what seems like another $300/mo in random bills and shit.

As Long as There is Beer I'm There. > ColoradoTaco 10/08/2015 at 17:52

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Yeah WHERE DO YOU LIVE!? 35k? I could maybe afford that 30 year mortgage!

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > BoxerFanatic, troublesome iconoclast. 10/08/2015 at 19:45

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But the entire roof is a window. Seriously from the top of the windshield to the rear hatch is all sunroof with just one cross brace under it.

BoxerFanatic, troublesome iconoclast. > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 10/08/2015 at 23:18

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The question is... is the cross brace right where following traffic is located, and can you see anything within 20 yards of the back bumper, when backing up? the belt line is very high, too. It is cool looking from the outside, though. The thing is, Disco Sport isn’t too bad looking either, and has a practical roofline, albeit not a 3-door variant, unfortunately.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > BoxerFanatic, troublesome iconoclast. 10/09/2015 at 09:36

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The cross brace is in the roof, and rear visibility sucks but it has a camera.